Confessions of a Carbivore – A Day Without Carbs

“Is there anything you don’t eat on a tortilla?” a friend commented on a recent food pic.

Looking through my food-heavy feed on instagram I realized the common theme: tortillas and carbs.

I recall learning about the food pyramid but my journalism background may have led me to invert it and consume an ungodly amount of carbs and whole grains. Thankfully my Italian metabolism destroys them like pac-man chomps ghouls.

Previously, I claimed there were only three things preventing me from being the next Bachelor:

  • larger pecs
  • abs
  • being a douche

Some argued #3 shouldn’t be an issue.

In an effort to develop a firm A cup and legit abs–apparently I can’t pass off my ribs as abs– some fitness-minded friends suggested I cut back the carbs and eat a more balanced diet. My doc also tried to preach this malarkey when I gained 5 pounds in a year.

With that, I began a day-long quest to not eat a tortilla or carb. (Can a quest be 24 hours?)


Here was my dinner. Pan-seared chicken boob with carrots, onion, spinach, garlic and lemon juice. The dish was tasty but I kept thinking, “know what would make this great?Rice!


This was my morning feast. 2 eggs, spinach, red/green peppers frozen veggie mix. I intended it to be Ann omelette but the eggs weren’t cooperating. Scrambled it is. But while eating, I kept thinking, “know what would make this better? Buttered whole wheat toast.”

My last meal completing my day sans carbs was a Mediterranean salad. We had leftovers at work. So I combined some mixed up lettuce, sausages, cucumber and tomato salad and assorted ethnic dips/sauces. Crazy flavorful but I kept thinking, “know what would make this better? A warm tortilla.”

I survived a day without carbs but I certainly gained more respect for those that can’t process gluten or carbs. I love pasta and tortillas far too much to go carb-free, but it’s certainly worth reducing how many I ingest especially if it reduces my carb comas and gets me on television.


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